There are times when you don’t realize something precious until you lose them. Too bad, huh?
I did mention that I’m likely considered as a person who’s difficult to fall in love. My close friends think that I am easily having a crush, well, they misunderstood me. During my junior high school days, there are some good-looking-guys-in-my-opinion, but that’s all. It’s not like I have feelings for them or anything. Because no special personality to be awed of, and no chemistry between us, of course. According to my observations, teenagers easily ‘fall-in-love’, flirt, confess, date that person, but then subsequently break up. Then, within just a short time period like…2 months let’s say, they already have their new lover.
It’s not like I’m judging them, but well, I have a different perspective. I’m attracted to a diligent, persevering, good sense of humour, independent….type of guy. Let’s say ‘Mr. Right’. Which I’ve never met him before. Dating my ex-boyfriend was one of the worst decision in my life. But well, it was difficult and odd since he was forcing me, not because of my genuine feelings. I wrote about him in this post.
A throwback to those early days I entered Senior High School.
As the time flows by…I was already in year 10. I didn’t make a lot of new friends since I entered the same school. However, during the freshman orientation, I met an impressive yet gracious guy who was sitting next to me. He wore a geeky style type of glasses. He was good looking. He was slender, and he likely not very tall for a High School guy, even though he was taller than me. He cordially started a conversation with me and we acquainted ourselves.
Indeed, he’s Mr. Possible.
Of course, I can’t reveal his real name.
Turns out, we get along very well. He has a good sense of humor, he liked and enjoyed teasing me–well either do I. Another surprising thing is that we were in the same class; XF. Day by day I began to know more about him, we also share the same taste in music, cool isn’t it? Ah, I just realized something. Indeed, he’s really my type of guy. He possessed all those good characters above, even those that I didn’t mention here. But I never have the chance to confessed my feelings to anybody. My friends never know about this. I was not a type of girl who would dare to confess, hence I…could never conveyed my feelings toward him. Moreover, we were close friends, I often told my problems to him and…the other way around. He also loves my cooking. I remembered his happy and thankful face when I baked a chocolate cake for his birthday. Hmmm, you could imagine how hard it’s like to admiring and adoring your own close friend (…or it’s just me?). On our last days in the first semester, serendipitously we were in the same group for making a Japanese-language short film. I was with my close friend too, Niken. Our film was tremendously pretty cool I guess, I put a huge effort on it. Even though, we were absolutely amateurs.
(Sigh) good times, good times.
Things are about to change even since my ex-boyfriend started to approach my peaceful life by his superstitious affection.
Nah, I’m too lazy to tell the whole story. It’ll disgust me even more.
However, he totally disagreed and dislike my relationship with my ex-boyfriend. He even said that he’s hoping I could break up with my ex as soon as possible. Ugh, I should’ve listened to him anyway. How ironic.
Sadly, I have to be separated from him in year 11 due to our failure entering the Science Class. He moved to another private school in Pondok Indah area while I moved to a Public School in Tanah Kusir. (sigh) I wonder how could I ever meet such a guy like him for the second time?
But we are able maintained our friendship. We still hang out together. We still chat to each other through social media. It seems that everything is fine. Although there are two things that what I regret the most: I neglected his concern toward me about my ex, and I never have the chance to let him know about my feelings. Even if he knew, It’ll be just one-sided, as always.